The Cross

The Cross

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Where I'm Coming From

About me...

I was raised in a Christian home.  As a teenager I was "born again."  I realize for many that phrase is outdated or inaccurate.  Everyone is entitled to their opinion but here is how it happened to me.  I sat under Holy Ghost anointed preaching and fell under conviction.  It felt like I had a weight sitting on my chest.  At the end of the service when the alter call was given, I could feel something pulling at me and knowing I needed to respond.  I fought it for a long time until finally I gave in.  I don't remember what I said or prayed and I don't even remember walking up to the front of the church.  But afterwards I felt like I had a bath on the inside.  Our church had no baptistery, so one Sunday after church we drove up to a spot beside a creek simply known as "the old sycamore tree."  My uncle was the pastor of our church, so he and I walked out into the water and I was baptized in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost.

It was those days as a young Christian where I learned to study the Bible.  When I was 18 I was asked to teach the senior adults class at church on youth Sunday.  That was scary to say the least.  I took my friend Scott with me for emotional support.  After the lesson, he said I did well, except for my 140 "you knows."  Hopefully I've improved since then.

As I grew, I got more involved in church.  I started out as an usher, then later became an assistant Sunday School teacher.  In the meantime I graduated from high school then college, got married and started a family, and became more active in church.  At one point I was the teacher of the adult Bible class, Sunday School Superintendent, and I even led the Wednesday night Bible study during the months when our church didn't have a pastor.  Then the day came when I felt like God was calling me to be an evangelist.  I told the church one night, and afterwards started preaching.  Things were going as well as I could expect. I suppose it may sound like I'm bragging but keep reading.  I did everything right, or as right as I knew to do them.  That's when the bottom fell out of it.

Divorce.  I never expected it to happen to me but it did.  Me - a preacher - was getting divorced.  How could I face people?  What would happen to my ministry?  I never admitted it, but I was angry at God.  After all, I had done everything right - and now it was all gone.  How could he let this happen?  I laid the preaching aside and decided I would put my focus elsewhere.  After I did, I never felt like my life had any stability.  I was blessed enough to find someone who would love me as I was.  But my preaching was always at the back of my mind when it should have been at the forefront of my life.  I let go of the zeal for Bible study that I once had and my life took a bad turn.

Now here I am some years later, and for some reason the zeal for Bible study has returned.  Some won't understand what I am about to say, but others will.  I've started getting sermons again - like I used to.  I've sat up many nights when I was younger as the Spirit of God gave me sermons and messages to deliver.  For a long time that was gone, but it's back now.  I can only think that God still has a work for me. 

I know what many will say.  "You can't do that - you've been divorced."  I've heard it all before.  In fact, I was told by my pastor at the time that my ministry would no longer have any effect.  So I thought - "What's the use?"  But there must be some use left in me.  The world needs the gospel, and we are commanded to make disciples of all nations.  I have a responsibility - regardless of what anyone else says. You can disagree, but that isn't going to stop me from being obedient.  Maybe I'm entering the fields at the 11th hour, and I know there will be obstacles.  Yet, I am comforted to know that God is the God of a second chance.  I must respond, and I will. 



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